This is excellent. Love the song and the comedic timing.
Thank you! We're glad you liked the short!
now I have diabetes... honestly, this cartoon is what gave it to me 16 years ago. i am pretty glad, however, that my pump does not talk like that.
I am sure you would love a passionate insulin pump! wink wink.
Humbly, I disagree
Sure, the world is full of many fishes, but artists like you and me contemplate the water, and that makes us more than a fish, or an ant, or whatever scurrying worker animal is like those suits walking down Wall St. each day... I find hope in the contemplation, and then daring to break from the pack and do what others don't... how many fish make experimental films?
your own creativity argues against your film's thesis ;)
so do more stuff like this! you're no fish... :D
Your South Park style characters totally contradicted the message. It's hard to be sad for a paper cut-out that I'm used to laughing at ;)
I enjoyed the style, but
...it just didn't make me laugh. You guys have such a popular cartoon already, but if you spent a little more time on the writing, it could be so much better. The jokes are funny, but they just aren't fast-paced enough to be clever.
Good comedy writing needs jokes that lead into each other, and relate to one another. I thought there was too much inbetween the laughs that really detracted from the whole thing.
There's so much potential here; just take a lesson from Family Guy and keep the jokes funny and often.
Praise + Suggestions
i loved the concept, and i loved how the first robot's face was sad even when smiling. good stuff!
i felt you took something away from the robot's character though when he grabbed the axe. it was hard to sympathize with him afterwards, though i am glad it was nothing suicidal. perhaps he could have been set up by the other robot, who then would have killed him for his 'just' cause.
the human could have been more detailed to match the robot. when he held the blanket up to his face, it didn't match and looked slightly awkward
intercut titles are nice, but maybe a few too many at the beginning. they tend to raise expectations very high, as in a feature length film. I say keep them for the end in shorts.
also, and this may be personal preference, but i would have found the whole thing much more artistic if it were in black and white. honestly, just try it and see how it looks :)
just a few ideas,
hey there, thank you for the suggestions! I found them all to be very helpful and agree that all of them would almost definitely help to make the movie better.
I don't think I will bother changing things in this particular movie, but I'll keep your advice in mind working on my other movies. Thanks again!
But can't you spell? Grapics? Animatiors? C'mon...
Try drawing a few extra frames for fighting next time. If you had just one extra one where the zealot pulled his arm in, you could switch back and forth between that and the extended one.
It might look better than tweening everything.
well there adam... you these are early days, i know my spelling is bad but hey?... you knew what it ment, "and it might look better than tweening everything?" well iv spent a few seconds looking at your work and basicly out he selection i chose... stick men... *tweened with some basic fbf*, a real time moive?... not even flash, and joes grad... yeah what ever, i dont really care, but thanks for having the time to review, and if u think im be harsh im not, i do it to everyone... *dam 13 year old porn addicted children!!!* well thanks for your views and trust me my later ones with have far more fbf and stuff in them... keeping and an inprovment of the graphics as well... chow
Funny, but, done...
I can see why you'd want to animate Monty Python's 'The word Fuck.' It's funny stuff... but how long would it have taken you to figure out who made it, and what videos are already out there? If you want to animate for a sound you've come across, do a little research and find out how you can add something to it.
1. work on transitions! simply fading out with no sound whatsoever is bland and uninteresting. There's nothing wrong with fast cuts.
2. sound quality. That girl's voice was all crackily. What happened to the mic you used for the rest of the voices? If it was the same one, what happened?
3. pacing! That tv commercial was mercilessly long. Based on experience, things are usually funnier when they happen fast and unexpectedly. Don't dwell on the same jokes!
Now in the vain hope that somebody reads this, if not the author himself, i leave you to work on a cartoon of my own.
Why do such talented artists insist on sticks?
It doesn't make any sense. Sure, there's something about stick fights that only sticks can do, but it's tired. The scenes with people in them were awesome, especially the first one.
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